I'm rattling my saber, looking for the neighbors Trying not to belabor the manual labor it takes to make a Buick LeSabre (discooooo) Then I ache to bake a cake Not fake like a whip snake or cornflake Harlem Shake coffee break (discooooo) Then it's time to abandon ship Like a potato chip clip or a bacon strip on an ego trip to the Gaza strip (discooooo) Then I grab some java And some guava and cava and kielbasa from Kinshasa, walk past the lava to the plaza with my girl Hiawatha (discooooo) Then it's a Joseph Smith myth On the fifth of November, and I remember that the council members stoked the embers of the fictional center (discooooo) And now it's winter When there are no more sprinters and the sisters and brothers with the dot matrix printers are busy getting splinters (discooooo) I get crazy with the cheese whiz Like a Markie named Biz taking a showbiz pop quiz about Bundle of Hiss, whoomp, there it is (discooooo) Where oh where is the tender loving care That like Vanity Fair makes me despair about a koala bear in the electric chair saying his morning prayer for laissez-faire (discooooo) Then I get a warning for mourning And I'm learning and squirming And I'm disarming like Prince Charming And I'm confirming and conforming And I'm burning and churning And I'm storming and swarming And I'm disarming without forewarning And I'm driving and arriving alive And I'm rambling and stumbling through words and verbs for the nerds and blerds (discooooo) Maybe I'll get a Picasso baby For Matt Taibbi and a leading lady who could be 80 or shady lately like a Katie from Haiti (discooooo) Just then I pull out my pass and jump on the bus With gloomy gus Antonio Banderas who mistrusts and adjusts the Hot Fuss cuts (discooooo) Now I'm living in the capital city With quickie anonymity and authenticity for a busy, giddy, hippie, picky, tricky kiddie named Lil Dicky (discooooo) I don't give four bucks for a Starbucks cup Suck it up or you'll be stuck when I stick up the stand up Scooby pup (discooooo) Skirts make my pants so tight it hurts My words reassert that perverts revert at concerts where desserts are served by rent-a-Hertz (discooooo) I look, but I can't find Waldo on the map So I use my bubblewrap thinking cap, tighten my shoulder strap and close the trade gap (discooooo) I think I see a hashtag on the American flag But it's really a body bag made from the coefficient of drag or a time lag sight gag (discooooo) I'm not in Spain, but it might rain on my airplane That vein is on the train to Ukraine with a military campaign vs. Bahrain that'll be stopped by eminent domain (discooooo) Then I get a warning for mourning And I'm learning and squirming And I'm disarming like Prince Charming And I'm confirming and conforming And I'm burning and churning And I'm storming and swarming And I'm disarming without forewarning And I'm driving and arriving alive And I'm rambling and stumbling through words and verbs for the nerds and blerds (discooooo)

In the age of paranoia They're always out to get ya Everything they say Is designed to scare ya Everything on tv Is made to scare ya Everything on the web Is there to scare ya Planet earth, rebirth, United nations, Good relations, Starvation, radiation, salvation, education, Violence, silence, Nigerian prince, Wall Street, corporate greed, skunk weed, stampedes ... Human Centipede Continental drift, graveyard shift, Airline food, wet firewood, Flash floods, crips and bloods, Baby boomers, brain tumors, ... look at all these rumors Capital punishment, disillusionment, dissidents, abandonment, disfigurement, paying rent, Pink slime, rampant crime, outta wine, outta my mind, ... outta my mind, out of time Widspread panic, drivin and cryin, drive-by truckers, stupid motherfuckers, sunspots, evil robots, Dry rot, ... raising up off the cot, Mail fraud, stink bombs, barking dogs, raining frogs, Bad acid, bad mojo, bad vibes, bad karma, bad sex, bad jokes, Bad luck, pickup trucks, wax build-up, two girls one cup, Pollution, isolation, extinction, discrimination, damnation, obsession, mutually assured destruction, electrocution, soil erosion, graduation, suffocation, friction, diction, Dead at Dawn, potholes on my lawn, snooze button, missed connections, chain reactions, bomb explosions, dashboard confessions, bad reception, bad decisions, sneak attacks, super PACs, Muzak, Scarab beetles, tattoo needles, Meet the Deedles, going on strike, riding my bike ... with no handlebars, no handlebars public speaking, public freaking, global warming, price fixing, drowning, falling, robocalling, freezing, choking, downsizing, outsourcing, neo-Nazis, Joanie loves Chachi, metal fatigue, bubonic plague, card sharks, land sharks, artificial hearts guns, gun lovers, ...Nuclear war, I wanna take you to a gay bar, dipshits, diphthongs, dumbbells, drunk drivers, Cancer, dull scissors, broken zippers, evil neighbors, prowlers, Alzheimer's, Disasters, Gamblers, Pushers, failure, murder, bipolar disorder, pedophiles, Fires, liars, bald tires, Losin friends, losin friends ... Ya got nothin to lose Ya dont lose when you lose fake friends...fake friends Close talkers, stalkers, shot blockers, ballers, shot callers, North Korea, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Iraq, Iran Meth, molly, pot, crack, smack, coke, ... Shit, this ain't no joke Going broke, being the joke, mad cow, falling dow, broken vow Androgyny, homosexuals, heterosexuals, bisexuals, bitches and ho's, sexism, Cynicism, terrorism, plagiarism, conservatism, liberalism, anarchism, racism, Common cold, getting old, black mold, black gold, fake gold, gotta fold Angry birds, dirty words, freaks and geeks, guns and nuns, Dynamite, parasites, snake bites, mosquito bites, termites, fright night Unsafe at any speed, angry molesting trees Killer bees, killer fleas, Lou Gehrig's got his own disease, poverty, cruelty, apathy, envy, lost keys, Entropy, armed teens, the Freshman fifteen, bankruptcy, fertility, ...surgery, surgery, Hair loss, tooth loss, hearing loss, killer frost, ...chaos, chaos Runaway trains, chilled monkey brains, bloodstains, clogged drains, acid rain, gridlock, Doc Ock, Dr. Spock, viagra cocks, Water spout, striking out, drought, gout, lockouts, ... Dude can I take your daughter out CIA, HIV, FBI, KKK, PLO, PLAs, IRS, IRA, NRA, NBA, MBA, NFL, AFL, CIO, CPA, TSA, Hey hey hey hey Revolution, evolution, masturbation, flagellation, Integration, mediation, United Nations, regulation Repetition, repetition, repetition, repetition, anyone, anyone, I'm done In the age of paranoia They're always out to get ya Everything they say Is designed to scare ya Everything on tv Is made to scare ya Everything on the web Is there to scare ya Shit What, me worry?

Can I kick it? No you can't Can I stick it? No you can't Can I wile out? No you can't Can I sell out? Yes you can Can I kick it? No you can't Can I stick it? No you can't Can I wile out? No you can't Can I sell out? Yes you can Can I smoke a little weed? No, no, no Can I waste money on a deed? Yes, yes, yes Can I pop a few pills? No, no, no Can I live in Beverly Hills? Yes, yes, yes Can I pop a few tabs? No, no, no Can I pledge allegiance to the flag? Yes, yes, yes Can I get a good job? No, no, no Can I get another corrupt cop? Yes, yes, yes Can I get a raise in the minimum wage? No, no, no Can I live my life in a stinking cage? Yes, yes, yes Can I get a new library? No, no, no Can I get a new oil refinery? Yes, yes, yes Can I see an indie flick? No, no, no Can I get another oil slick? Yes, yes, yes Can I raise up my voice? No, no, no Can I hear some more pointless noise? Yes, yes, yes Can I kick it? No you can't Can I stick it? No you can't Can I wile out? No you can't Can I sell out? Yes you can Can I kick it? No you can't Can I stick it? No you can't Can I wile out? No you can't Can I sell out? Yes you can Can I get a loan for a car? No, no, no Can I go fight a meaningless war? Yes, yes, yes Can I get some real news? No, no, no Can I get some real blues? Yes, yes, yes Can I hear some new radio? No, no, no Can I keep the old status quo? Yes, yes, yes Can I get a little dome? No, no, no Can I keep it real dumb? Yes, yes, yes Can I get my ass spanked? No, no, no Can I get my credit yanked? Yes, yes, yes Can I get tied up? No, no, no Can I get a red solo cup? Yes, yes, yes Can I kiss another man? No, no, no Can I eat dinner from a can? Yes, yes, yes Can I eat healthy food? No, no, no Can I keep being fooled? Yes, yes, yes Can I kick it? No you can't Can I stick it? No you can't Can I wile out? No you can't Can I sell out? Yes you can Can I kick it? No you can't Can I stick it? No you can't Can I wile out? No you can't Can I sell out? Yes you can

I'm a friend of Miley Cyrus, she can twerk if she wants to I'm a friend of the janitors, who do all your work for you I'm a friend of Macklemore, he's doing his best to do the right thing I'm a friend of Lil Wayne, if he wants his bling, let em have his bling I'm a friend of honest cops, it's hard to do right with so much wrong around you I'm a friend of single mothers, we couldn't do what we do if they didn't do what they do I'm a friend of Kid Rock, white music and black music, fight music, not whack music I'm a friend of Kenrick, dropping a little control on the music, that shit was sick I'm a friend of strippers, if I could make money off the way I look, I would, too I'm a friend of the IRS, somebody's gotta do it, if it was you, you'd hate you, too I'm a friend of Bono, call him what you want, few people do more for the poor I'm a friend of fast food workers, exploited to pay the bills, exploited for lack of skills I'm a friend of union members, standing up for everyone's right to dignity and respect I'm a friend of Obama, he's not perfect, neither are you, let's see you try to have an effect I'm a friend of Flavor Flav, yeah he's a little crazy, but so are you and I I'm a friend of Chuck D, he made social consciousness something you had to buy I'm a friend of Britney, bitch, lets stop judging people dealing with shit we don't know about I'm a friend of Jay-Z, good to see a hustler rise up and get so much clout I'm a friend of Nasty Nas, always bringing it hard, before you and God, I give em a head nod I'm a friend of Hillary, breaking glass ceilings, while dealing with men who are flawed I'm a friend of Uncle Luke, sure the lyrics of his songs were shit, but he said things that people actually say I'm a friend of Kanye, he was right about Taylor and Bush, even if he's rude, his shit's cray I'm a friend of Trayvon, still we have fear of a black planet, but I'll say it, Fuck George Zimmerman! I'm a friend of Charlie Sheen, doing more winning at life than most other winners can I'm a friend of homeless people, there's no reason, no way, no how, this should be in a free country I'm a friend of welfare mothers, society fails too many people and this isn't how its supposed to be I'm a friend of Elizabeth Warren, I like my women strong, and one like her will be president before too long I'm a friend of Cheech and Chong, let's get it on, no prison time for a guy selling a bong I'm a friend of Beyonce, nobody puts on a better show, nobody works harder, yo I'm a friend of the troops on the ground, putting their boots on and going to places we'll never go I'm a friend of prisoners doing time for drug possession, casualties of a stupid drug war obsession I'm a friend of the teachers of the world, session after session, lesson after lesson I'm a friend of Grandmaster Flash, on the wheels of steel, made a new culture and music real to me I'm a friend of children and students, we don't own em, shouldn't control em, should help em be free I'm a friend of Eminem, when he goes round the outside, round the outside, I'm along for the ride I'm a friend of Big Boi and Andrew 3000, originality of days, in so many ways it's craze-y I'm a friend of bus drivers, it's a shit job, for shit pay, that lasts all of the shitty day I'm a friend of fire fighters, putting their lives on the line, and they still get shitty pay I'm a friend of the survivors, attacked by rapists, then the legal system, then the public I'm a friend of the survivors, beaten by parents and spouses, no refuge in their own house I'm a friend of the addicts and alcoholics, punished by society after punishing themselves I'm a friend of the garbage collectors, cleaning up the refuse we leave behind or lose I'm a friend of DJ Kook Herc, I've imagined being at those block parties a million times I'm a friend of Afrika Bambaataa, I've listened to those spins a million times I'm a friend of undocumented immigrants, birth shouldn't determine your destiny and life I'm a friend of artists, they say what we all think and feel and need and want and bleed I'm a friend of revolutionaries, the system is broken those who break it are my friends I'm a friend of you, you don't and won't suffer alone, I'll be your friend until the end

You, you, you... You, you're abhorrent and absent, arrogant, belligerent, bent and silent, hesitant and ignorant abrasive and abusive, evasive and defective, possessive and repulsive, an obedient miscreant alcoholic and erratic, idiotic and apathetic, materialistic and frantic, simplistic and phobic aloof and overconfident, deaf and incompetent, rough and stiff, pathetic and psychotic you're annoying and boring, disgusting and frightening, limping and lying, screeching and squealing disillusioned and afraid, bored and rude, jaded and jumbled, languid and muddled average but strange, vague and wrong, earsplitting and irritating, loud and sad cold and dead, lewd and crude, redundant and violent, bitter and bizarre You, you're familiar and minor, poor and sore, sour and vulgar, superficial and typical boorish and brash, devilish and harsh, oafish and selfish, snobbish and squeamish foolish and loutish, common and craven, unknown and uneven, broken and green cheap and ripe, cowardly and lonely, ugly and unruly, cumbersome and gruesome you're lame and tame, drab and taboo, odd and old, tiresome and humdrum delicate and irate, late and light, trite and uptight, obsolete and offbeat flat and mute, drunk and sick, warlike, childlike, upset and illiterate hollow and low, not macho you're slow, narrow and shallow, last and soft You, you're hurt and difficult, ashamed and bewildered, condemned and confused, damaged and defeated depressed and deserted, deranged and disturbed, embarrassed and absurd, frightened and faded overrated and puzzled, rabid and ragged, rigid and roasted, scared and scattered crooked and tired, unarmed and wretched, squalid and stupid, troubled and wicked you're bashful and awful, cynical and shrill, simple and small, spiteful and cruel stereotypical, stale, unaccountable and testy, undesirable and trashy, mundane and obscene doubtful and dull, dysfunctional and frail, fanatical and laughable, feeble and forgetful fragile and breakable, hateful and horrible, gullible and volatile, hysterical and juvenile You, you're ambiguous and anxious, callous and capricious, delirious and disastrous, envious and jealous hapless and helpless, hideous and homeless, infamous, insidious, loose and ludicrous mindless and motionless, malicious and false, nervous and noxious, flimsy and gaudy pointless and ruthless, scandalous and spurious, tasteless and tedious, careless and thoughtless venomous and zealous, voiceless and worthless, unnatural and tricky, unsuitable and weary You, you're... Angry and dizzy, bloody and dirty, clumsy and crazy, crabby and creepy Dreary and dusty, empty and filthy, faulty and flaky, tense and obnoxious Goofy and greasy, greedy and grouchy, grubby and grumpy, homely and hungry Imaginary and icy, jumpy and nutty, lazy and messy, murky and mushy Needy and nosy, puny and pushy, raspy and shaky, silly and sleepy Slimy and slippery, sloppy and smelly, sneaky and spooky, snotty and spotty Sticky and stingy, sulky and scrawny, tacky and tawdry, tiny and temporary Tiny and temporary Tiny and temporary You, you, you...

You, you, you... You, you're adaptable and beautiful, colossal and cool, historical and honorable, faithful and lethal, You, you're invincible and magical, likeable and lyrical, merciful and peaceful, perpetual and powerful, You, you're knowledgeable and real, rebel but responsible, substantial and successful, addicting and amazing, You, you're alluring and amusing, astonishing and dazzling, charming and entertaining, interesting and exciting, You, you're fascinating and stimulating, adventurous and ambitious, auspicious and boundless, ceaseless and curious, You, you're conscious and courageous, fearless and flawless, glamorous and hilarious, humorous and loose, You, you're righteous and stupendous, mysterious and outrageous, marvelous and momentous, productive and reflective, You, you're decisive and inquisitive, spectacular and super, debonair and fair, You, you're magnificent and observant, omniscient and resonant, coherent and complete, defiant and different, You, you're diligent and eminent, efficient and elegant, resolute and robust, alert and literate, You, you're brainy and classy, friendly and funny, groovy and jazzy, lively and mighty, You, you're nifty and witty, necessary and ready, steady and swanky, tremendous and fierce, You, you're ubiquitous and wise, victorious and vigorous, thankful and thoughtful, truthful and useful, You, you're determined and proud, educated and gifted, talented and tested, cultured and poised, You, you're unequaled and wild, dynamic and fantastic, energetic and electric, unique and sleek, You, you're exotic and melodic, psychedelic and futuristic, premium and supreme, enthusiastic and majestic, You, you're... Elite and sweet, lush and fresh, alive and brave, quick and sick, Rough and tough, rare and aware, sincere and clear, strong and calm, Clean and keen, deep and nonstop, good and kind, new and true You, you, you...

This shit'll make you drop your cocks and glocks and get on your fox socks You're gonna walk to stalk me because of the way that I talk This shit's got no squawk or schlock, it's like Spock rock I got a lot of jocks to mock, bad cops to knock Peeps are gonna flock to gawk at the lyrical hawk You'll be in a headlock deadlock like you got in the wrong wedlock Don't know why you thought I forgot how to create a sonic aftershock This isn't ad hoc, or a crock, got it locked up like a ziplock I balk at bad lyrics like soldiers in Iraq with the shellshock I'll walk you down the crosswalk or catwalk, I'll make your bedrock I'll take you on a spacewalk, get around any landlock or roadblock Take down Dock Ock or Killer Croc, keep flowing without a dropoff Even if your block is chock full of livestock You can trade in some boxtops at the Stop N Shop At your top mach speed, kill yourself with hemlock I'm the warlock of words, the Rupert Murdoch of nerds Lyrical lawyer like Perry Mason or Matlock You'll be hiding in the tunnels like a Morlock I'm too original to get any play on K Roq If you're the last to hear it, you'll be a laughingstock It'll get you wired like electroshock It gets kinda offensive like when you say Shylock But I'm revealing some truths like Morgan Spurlock I'm digging up secrets like my name was Sherlock Dropping new ideas like John Locke Making you bump along like Ad Rock or 2 Pac Got you shelling out shamrocks like Maybach and Reebok Rhymes hard for you to say like Vladivostok This shit won't disappoint like Hancock I'm murdering shit like Hitchcock After this album, you'll be celebrating like Ewoks Grooving and moving like hippies at Woodstock Because I know what I speak and I speak what I know I flow what I rhyme and I rhyme what I flow I show what I learn and I learn what to show I blow, I go, I glow, I grow, I throw, whoa! So go get two sticks of Twix to fix Your verbal tics like a cough flipped by Vicks Or a pitbull ripped by Michael Vick Rex ain't that kind of sick, join my clique Stick with me and my chicks, get your kicks Get some pics and get some clicks We ain't going to the clubs with the strips and tips We ain't sailing on ships, or having fits We'll skip those trips, drop those drips Make sure not to dip into those pits, quick Lets inflict the conflict like its divided demographics I predict the images I depict will transfix Bring you bliss like fish and chips Silly rabbit, these trix are for kids Like New York Knicks are for fans Like the River Styx is for dead mans Dicks and pricks and redneck hicks Will try to deep six and nix my mix But my clips are Gladys Knight to your Pips My images are so graphic, your braggadocio dips If you're ignorant, my flow is hieroglyphics You can't understand my specifics, this ain't no gimmick But you will mimic my mosaic heroics That will smash the cynics, boost the addicts Afflict the convicts, make em take trips to the Pacific To stay out of the bricks to hear my flicks and hits It'll get you happy like Macklemore Thrifts or Schoolboy Q's spliffs This disc of riffs is brisk, audio gifts that only risk To eclipse your wish to only talk about Whips and thick chicks, tucks and nips, lips to kiss, hips to miss Clocks to grip, fifths to sip, scripts to pick This shit ain't weak like stop and frisk, this shit is the ish It won't make you say tisk, tisk, like and absentee St. Nick Because I know what I speak and I speak what I know I flow what I rhyme and I rhyme what I flow I show what I learn and I learn what to show I blow, I go, I glow, I grow, I throw, whoa! Oh, you ain't through, you ain't bored, you want more If more whoa is what you want, I'll give you verse three or four It's no chore, I can roar like a dinosaur till my throat is sore I can soar like a Norse named Thor, go bamf and teleport I swore I'd escape your corpse, before you make me snore anymore You rhyme like your shit is written in a code called Morse Here's the score: you I abhor, I deplore, I ignore I don't need anyone to help me score, I am my own mentor Running this shit like a Michaels named Lorne I'm pouring hot shit like Dior or a Dali called Salvador It's a 24-hours-a-day Cold War between my lore and your deplorable yore, Egor, or is it Igor Your dialogue is worse than porn, you're outscored before you even launch your war Your verbal colors are badd, you want me to say I ador mi amor I'll shout nevermore like a funeral for Lenore Judge your shit like Sonia Sotomayor, no espirt de corps At least one of us isn't a perdidor, senor Let me underscore, with scorn, it ain't you paramour, therefore Let me restore the rapport with the heretofore master everybody asks for I got girls like Gilmore, they all say "feed me Seymour" Gonna be filling up dance floors as big as the Fillmore Backing up doors like John Densmore Making references diverse as Bjork and Jim Thorpe Doing intellectual parkour, I'm a time warp dork I can see more shit than Geordi LaForge My rhymes leave you in the metaphorical morgue, friends mourn I got truth galore, inconvenient for you like Al Gore I'm hardcore, I'm New York, you're Zsa-Zsa Gabor On the run like Jason Bourne, hiding in the Azores Like a toxic event, you're airborne I'm telling you the awful truth, sicko, like Michael Moore I know it'll leave you stillborn and forlorn, of course The force of this source that tells you ney! like a horse Because I know what I speak and I speak what I know I flow what I rhyme and I rhyme what I flow I show what I learn and I learn what to show I blow, I go, I glow, I grow, I throw, whoa!

Not bitches or witches Not crows or hoes You'll never understand What a real woman knows She's a woman, not a slave Doing your part is not a fave or Or are you too dumb You don't want more You can't handle more Can't handle the real thing Can't handle a real queen Can't handle a real woman You are not a real man From the real women You always ran You'll always run You ain't getting none None of the things A real woman gives None of the things A real woman lives A real woman loves Men aren't from Mars Women ain't from Venus The thing that makes you special Ain't your fucking penis You ain't the cleanest or leanest Maybe the meanest You're so fucking blind You can't even see this The only thing special about you Is your education From you all the ladies Are taking a vacation Vacation Had to get away Vacation All they ever wanted From you all they get is frustration For you all that is left is masturbation In the battle of the sexes We need a fucking truce This disrespecting women Has got to reduce From you she needs More than sleepless nights Stop being a dumbass And respect her rights A woman has the right to have a good job A woman has the right to not be hit on by every fucking slob A woman has the right to say no at any time A woman has the right to to earn an equal dime A woman has the right to have sex with who she wants Without having to endure your juvenile taunts A woman has the right to dress how she likes A woman has the right to feel safe at night A woman has the right to play any sport A woman has the right to equality in the court A woman has the right if she wants to fight in war A woman has the right if she wants to open her own door A woman has the right to be president A woman has the right to set a precedent A woman has the right to make the same mistakes A woman has the right to not bake your fucking cake Not bitches or witches Not crows or hoes You'll never understand What a real woman knows

No such thing No such thing No such thing No such thing There's no such thing as... ESP, telepathy, EVP, palmistry, homeopathy, banshee, yeti, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, destiny, Illuminati No remote viewing, channeling, automatic writing, fortune telling, brainwashing, pentagram, talisman (it's bullshit) No telekinesis, pyrokinesis, psychokinesis, out of body experience, Santa Claus, haunted houses, curses No astral projection, precognition, teleportation, levitation, past life regression, spontaneous combustion (it's bullshit) No demons, possession, reincarnation, auras, karma, stigmata, chupacabra, sixth sense, seance No Loch Ness monster, vampires, mind control, anal probes, aliens, miracles, angels, time travel (it's bullshit) No such thing No such thing No such thing No such thing No luck, magick, psychics, Mind Freaks, biofeedback, macrobiotics, cryonics, chiropractic, Dianetics No Ouija board, tarot cards, John Edward, dowsing rods, tea leaves, aroma therapy, herbal remedies (placebo) No reflexology, numerology, phrenology, psychic surgery, cellular memory, alchemy, astrology, scientology No pig entrails, victim souls, crystals, colloidal minerals, spells, crystal skulls, Roswell, Bermuda Triangle (it's bullshit) No runes, charms, mediums, mesmerism, biorhythm, exorcism, ghosts, occult, metalists, Atlantis No prophets, Nostradamus, oracles, crop circles, trepanation, cold fusion, Area 51, intelligent design (it's bullshit) No such thing No such thing No such thing No such thing Dropping science about science

My hand scratched out the first draft of the Declaration of Independence I held the hands of the Underground Railroad transcendents I whispered the Rights of Man in Thomas Paine's ear I walked all 220 miles on the Trail of Tears I stood at Seneca Falls and called for suffrage and emancipation I was a founding member of the International Workingmen's Association I was splashed with blood when Booth shot Lincoln At Wounded Knee, I buried my heart and that of my son I was there for the era of the ERA I jumped out the window when the Stock Market crashed that day I lost my farm and livelihood in the Dust Bowl At Pearl Harbor, I ran around in my underwear doing damage control In 1942, they put me and my family in internment camps I watched the Atomic Bomb drop, it looked like an infrared lamp They blacklisted me in 1947, said I was a commie My life inspired Orwell to warn about commies and Nazis In 1950, I stood up to Joseph McCarthy on the floor of the Senate I knew that the execution of Rosenbergs wouldn't be the end of it I was William Gaines' attorney in 1954 Before Rosa Parks sat down, for her, I held open the door I howled with Alan Ginsberg in what some call sin I was thoroughly covered in mustard at the Greensboro sit-in I called shotgun when they started the Freedom Rides At the Bay of Pigs I walked beside the many who lost their lives I did research with Rachel Carson that Silent Spring I blocked access to the button when the Cuban Missile Crisis was in full swing When he said "I have a Dream," I stood next to MLK I watched from the grassy knoll during the JFK killing I served on the jury that convicted Malcolm X's killers I stumbled through Haight-Ashbury after taking so many thrillers I huddled in a dark apartment while Watts burned I was stuck in the shit when the Tet Offensive tide turned I shed many a tear when the shot rang out in the Memphis sky I shed many more when they decided that RFK, too, had to die I watched the launch of the rocket that spawned the Moon Landing I threw rocks at the cops in solidarity with what Stonewall was demanding I held the bloody hands of the students they shot at Kent State I saw the flashlights and called the police to the Watergate It fell to me to clean up the Three Mile Island mess I watched as Hinkley erased Lennon's last steps I swung a sledge hammer as the Berlin Wall fell I drove Brandon Teena's murderers to hell After the Oklahoma City bombing, I comforted too many parents I screamed loudly when James Byrd was killed by ignorance It was like a bad TV rerun when they did it to Matthew Shepard I had my vote for president stolen in a corrupt Florida election I jumped from tower seven on 9/11 I wore a hoodie as I watched life ebb from Trayvon Martin

I don't need to diss anyone, son, Not tearing shit down, to bring myself up, Hysterical lyrics come from a magic cup I drank all that shit, you can't have none Mixtape culture by the mile, making me smile Haven't been this hyped about hip hop in a while Now everybody's making beats, writing rhymes as a rapper But that don't make you an MC or a fly producer You sir, can listen to the radio, all the day-o But that won't help you learn to spit or make a banging sound Turn that shit off, put the boombox on the ground Read a book, go to a museum and see 'em Works by the great artists, get some fresh ideas Be inspired, get wired, your influences are mostly tired Enough songs about trees and cheese, get up off your knees I want you to drop some knowledge that makes me freeze I'm gonna Mike Tyson you till you can't hear no more You ain't old enough, like Traci Lords Your rhyme scheme is constructed like the Death Star One tight shot by a rookie And lookie Your shit's falling apart That's the best you can do? Your rhymes ain't true You step up to the mic And you're already through That's the same old song We heard a million times before Six minutes of your flow the crowd's sleeping on the floor From there to here From here to there Your little nursery rhymes Suck everywhere You're like that royal baby I didn't even know that you exist (I still don't) I don't know, like maybe Yeah, put me on your mailing list So I can be the first to know When you drop a whack new joint And help maintain the status quo While you were living on skid row I was getting paid to write by AFL-CIO The rhymes come out of me like an overflow And I'll chop up your shit like taekwondo The metaphors you use ain't even apropos I'll eat you up like you were a sloppy joe I just hear your rhymes and I'm all grumpy cat "no" What else can I say to your anemic, bulemic, hypoglycemic flow I'm thinking up new shit like my name was Rousseau I'm coming up with new images like my name was Van Gogh Time for you to shut down your John Doe puppet show Let it go, let me give you a quid pro quo Forgo your joe schmoe, joe blow, play dough, simple rhyme plateau And I'll streamline my flow Like I'm number one, and yell uno That's the best you can do? Your rhymes ain't true You step up to the mic And you're already through That's the same old song We heard a million times before Six minutes of your flow the crowd's sleeping on the floor From there to here From here to there Your little nursery rhymes Suck everywhere I'm like Crispin Glover, cause I can kick it I'm like Kerri Strug, cause I can stick it I'm like John Starks, cause I can brick it I'm like Kid Rock, cause I can hick it I'm old enough to know what these references mean I'm young enough to still know how to dream I'm old enough to know who was in the first Scream I'm young enough to still be first pick on any team You're going down like Paris Hilton on home video You make me drink like Paula Abdul before an interview You're making me pregnant like Tracy Morgan Filling me with fat like a bourbon chicken bargain I see your name when I Google whack MC You ain't the army You can't even be half of what you want to be You say more bad rhymes before 9 a.m. than most people say all day You'll probably come back with the same lame ass crass lines and rhymes About how I'm a woman, I'm white or I'm gay Like Drew Barrymore, getting that top off Unlike Ichabod Crane for you Rap Genius lyrical scoffs Schooling you like John Stewart ripped Tucker Carlson Schooling you like I'm the dad and you're my bad son That's the best you can do? Your rhymes ain't true You step up to the mic And you're already through That's the same old song We heard a million times before Six minutes of your flow the crowd's sleeping on the floor From there to here From here to there Your little nursery rhymes Suck everywhere

My nouns are like a katana, perfectly balanced My skillset is like lyrical nirvana, respect my talent My pronouns are like an AR-15, nice and clean Good enough to stop you and he and she and they and them, know what I mean My verbs are like an uzi and you can't do me I'll squeeze and blast, you'll freeze and crash, you see My adverbs are like an AK-47, lyrical, heavenly You barely, accidentally qualify as an MC, you aren't like me My metaphors are an RPG, my mind a skeleton key My songs a rhyme PhD, you a spelling bee losing flea My similies are like a lyrical trebuchet My vocab is large like the national debt, you're more like a lost pet My conjunctions are like anthrax, you don't make stacks And you sound whack or like a slacker after losing all battles because you're stuck in bottles My prepositions are flamethrowers, you're below me Before you began, you were already behind me, the opposite of plea-sing Your entire use of language is like a scud missile You'd be better off trying to kill me with a rape whistle Your words ain't weapons, you should've kept 'em Holster your lyrical pellet gun, son, you're done My interjections are a volcano mine Uh-oh, uh-huh, oh my, oh well, oops, ouch, ow! My symbols are like an IED Flags ain't just for the free, crosses and stars just ain't for me My alliteration is like chlorine gas I'll crush your cranium, crash you like you were stained glass, and take your ass to class My consonance is an Abrams tank I'm running and gunning, i'll knock your noggin, and take your rank My assonance is a predator drone The whole zone blows with flows like gold, you sold some shit, and you need to grow, bro My hyperbole is like a hellfire missile Bigger than the Beatles, badder than James Brown, brighter than the sun, son My metonyms are like the metal storm My sweat'll get me to a rap Cooperstown, you'll get a pink slip and feel super down My onomatopeia is is like an atom bomb Boom, boom, boom, pow, pow, wow, wow Your entire use of language is like a scud missile You'd be better off trying to kill me with a rape whistle Your words ain't weapons, you should've kept 'em Holster your lyrical pellet gun, son, you're done